The Walsh Brothers...?

Is it just me, or do Louis Walsh (of X Factor fame) and Willie Wash (of British Airways infamy) look like brothers? They may share more than a passing resemblance to each other, but that's where the similarity ends; Louis seems like basically a nice guy, if not a wee bit wimpy, however Willie is a fucking wanker (guess who I side with in the BA dispute).

In his handbagging tussles with Simon Cowell, poor old nice-guy Louis always seemed to end up second best. His 'brother' however, never gives an inch and is combative bastard. For example, way back in the dispute he withdrew an offer Unite were leaning towards. The renewed offer was minus the costs incurred during the dispute. Not very nice...Louis would have been much, much fairer. The next piece of dictatorial and arrogant pettiness was to withdraw the cheap travel perks from all strikers. For good. Nice piece of visionary industrial relations there, Willie...you prick. The guy has not shown one iota of compromise - and before you tory bum chums get going, compromise is an integral part of any negotiation held in a spirit of good faith.

Louis, have a word with your bro. I know he's a tosser and probably stole all your toys when you were kids, but have a chat.

In a quick change of direction, the new mutual ass-kissing club that is the tory/libdem coalition, has clearly shown whose side it is on. "I understand how difficult it can be when people's jobs have to change, but a prolonged series of strikes will weaken the company and put those jobs at risk" so says Hammond, the Transport Secretary. Fuck me, disputes ALWAYS involve at least two disagreeing parties. The proposed (and fucking expensive) strike plans have come about after Unite has, more than once, requested further negotiations.

I know my interpretation of events is just a tad lefty and I make no apologies for it. Regardless of my political leanings, Walsh (Willie, not Louis) has to take some blame for the protracted nature of the dispute, not to mention the costs, which have a lot of zeroes attached. Oh...by the way, has anyone any idea if the fatcat BA members have made any sacrifices to their remuneration package or working conditions??? I think the answer amounts to around...fuck all (excluding the removal of velvet toilet paper from the executive restrooms).

C'mon Louis, do what others cannot do or, more likely, are frightened to do. Convince that dickhead of a brother that he should try to be nicer.

Polansicko

At the beginning of the month, Polanski broke his silence regarding the ongoing extradition process from Switzerland. He said prosecutors wanted him to return so they could serve him "on a platter to the media". He’s no stranger to huge public attention and certainly has no problems with it when the fawning media lavish praise on him as a great director. Sorry Polanski, if you’re uncomfortable about your current position on this specific platter, well…fuck you. You had sex with a 13 year old girl and pissed off from the US when sentencing was imminent. You are accountable for this offence, regardless of the fact it occurred over 30 years ago and that you are some sort of demi-god in the eyes of some equally famous, rich and influential pals.

It sickens me to the gut that, because of his formidable movie-making fame, he is being supported by a queue of sycophants rallying to his side. Listen up assholes, this is the same bastard who had sex with a child! I’ve said it before - would your opinion remain unchanged if this 13 year old was one of your children?

Incidentally, this fuck was also rumoured to have started a relationship with Nastassja Kinski when she was 15 years old. See a pattern?

Back to the current extradition situation…Polanski made a 900-word statement in an online publication run by a prominent supporter, the French philosopher Bernard-Henri Levy, suggesting that the case being prepared against him by California prosecutors was unjust. He wrote, "I can no longer remain silent because the United States continues to demand my extradition, more to serve me on a platter to the media of the world than to pronounce a judgment concerning which an agreement was reached 33 years ago." Poor old you, Roman. Isn’t it just a crying shame that even though you are so fucking wonderful, you are still accountable.

Fuck you Polanski and every last one of your ass-licking supporters. You committed a despicable and unforgivable crime. I just hope that justice eventually prevails. I am however, a realist. Fame and fortune as powerful and potent as Polansicko’s can’t be ignored. I’m quite sure he will be treated somewhat differently than us lesser beings. The whole tawdry tale will probably be flushed away like an offensive turd.

Let’s just hope that, somehow, the US and the California prosecutors stand firm and a fitting outcome prevails. We’ll see…

Been a While...

The lengthy period between posts was due to a mixture of protracted health issues and a lengthy bout of CBFB (Couldn't Be Fucking Bothered).

I hope I can keep the momentum going and remain an online pain in the arse. We'll see how thing go from here on in.

Polanski is Detained - AND ABOUT FUCKING TIME!

In 1977, Roman Polanski – then aged 42 – had sex with a girl of 13. He has now been detained in Switzerland under an international warrant, some 32 years after the offence. The reactions have been odious…Polanski was "thrown to the lions," said French Culture Minister Frederic Mitterrand. "In the same way that there is a generous America that we like, there is also a scary America that has just shown its face." Whaaat! This fuck had sex with a young girl, barely old enough to enter secondary school. French Foreign Minister Bernard Kouchner said he hoped Polanski could be quickly freed by the Swiss, calling the apprehension a "bit sinister." Jesus Christ! What would the reactions have been had the young girl in question been their daughter. Somewhat different I would say and fervently hope.
Simply because Polanski is a film director of considerable note and talent, he appears, somehow, to be a special case. Had the offender been a working class nobody, the reactions would have been inevitably grossly different. Regardless of his fame, talent, riches and friends in high places, he is STILL a sickening, disgusting pervert.
Keep the bastard detained and have him extradited to the US. I hope that Secretary of State, Hilary Clinton, does not bend to the warped, collective wills of those Poles and French who seek to have the pervert Polanski treated as some sort of hallowed person who does not deserve the justice meted out to other lesser-known evil sickos.

Why?

Why is it that practically everything intended for human consumption carries a long and and comprehensive list of ingredients, yet cigarettes and tobacco don’t. We’re bombarded with information regarding the dangers of smoking, yet we really don’t know what’s filling our lungs. Sure, we’ve seen the gory and explicit photos of what smoking can do to our organs…so, why no list of ingredients?

An Ode to Gordon Ramsay (Yep, More Bad Poetry)

Gordon fucking Ramsay sure is a fucking prick
All his fucking swearing makes me fucking sick
His use of fucking curse words drives me fucking mad
He thinks he’s fucking macho, it’s really fucking sad

You’re just a fucking cook, you foul-mouthed fucking twat
You don’t impress me one bit when you act like a fucking brat
Fuck this, fuck that, fuck me, fuck you - change the fucking script
It’s fucking quite pathetic to watch you come unzipped

Cooking is a task traditionally done by females
But they get by quite easily without any curse-word wails
Wanna hear my theory, about Gordon fucking Ramsay?
The swearing’s just a cover-up - to hide he’s fucking gay

Nothing wrong with being gay, accept it Gordon please
Stop your fucking swearing and do something special with peas
Try to be a nice guy - it surely wouldn’t hurt
Try coming out of the closet and cook in a frilly skirt

A Little Bit of (Bad) Poetry

A man smoked hand rolled cigarettes
But he was lazy as you can get
So he trained a lizard to lick the paper
Compared to a snake it was bound to be safer
The only problem he had with it
Was all his smokes tasted like lizard spit

One sad day his trained lizard died
The lazy smoker coughed and cried
“Now I’ll have do it all myself “
He cursed a bit…”Oh bloody hell”
He started to think of a different plan
While munching on a strawberry flan

He made a smoke - what an ordeal
“I’ve got it” he said “I’ll train an eel!”
After some thought and deliberation
His initial joy turned to consternation
“They’re slimy and slippery and live in water”
“Every smoke would taste like snotter”

Pretty soon he took up toking
A better proposition than just plain smoking
Only problem was it took more toil
That was something that made him boil
How to get stoned with minimum effort
He’d think of something - he was an expert

One day stoned, well out of his brain
Thinking of easier ways again and again
Maybe a snake wasn’t so bad an idea
To give his skins that saliva smear
Rolling was a chore he’d endure
But licking that glue, he wasn’t so sure

Zonked again, he captured a rattler
With a tongue just right for licking a rizla
He tried the snake out later that night
“Wonder if it’ll bite me?” Too fucking right!
Breathing his last he said to the snake
Go dig my grave, and organise my wake